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What does a mediator do?

Mediation of divorces is the wave of the future in New Jersey.  Howes & Howes partner Kathy Howes offers divorce mediation.  Kathy Howes is an experienced divorce mediation and an experienced matrimonial attorney.  She knows the law and understands the human issues of divorce.  Kathy has successfully mediated divorces both as a court appointed mediator and as a private mediator.  This entry explains in a very basic way what a mediator does.

The mediator is a neutral professional - preferably an attorney - whose task is to help the parties reach a settlement.  First, the mediator must be sure that the parties know what they want to accomplish.  Can they picture their future life realistically?  Do they have a general plan of action?

When the parties understand what they want and seem willing to make some concessions, the mediator can begin to work with them.  The mediator helps them identify areas of agreement and of disagreement.  Once this is done, the parties agree to ground rules and begin to negotiate towards a solution.  The result of a successful negotiation is the key to their future.

The goal of a successful mediator is to guide the parties toward a negotiated solution.  Negotiated divorce agreements are more likely to stand the test of time than those reached through cut-throat litigation, and are less likely to end up as the subject of post-divorce litigation.  Negotiated agreements are in everyone’s best interests - spouses and children.  Emotions tend to run high in divorces.  The mediator’s professional incentive is to achieve a fair settlement.  As such, the mediator stands as a counterweight that the stress and the hurt that the parties are feeling during the break up of their marriage.

Once the parties have gone through the issues with the mediator, the mediator helps them by preparing a settlement agreement.  Once the settlement agreement is signed, the mediator’s job is complete, and the parties can take the next step.  If you have any questions about divorce mediation, then you should contact Kathy Howes at Howes & Howes


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